It’s not until I ask Jason to tilt his head back so I could rinse the soap out of his hair that he wants to turn the cup on me. It was a few days before I discovered the solution. Instead of bringing bath time to an end because he wants to dump water on me, I give him a situation where its okay to dump water on me.  I hang my feet over the tub and he washes and pours water on them.  It was turned from a win-lose, one for team mom getting to pour water on Jason, into a win-win.

There are going to be meltdowns, but those moments are important to a little one because there are important messages being delivered in the way in which it is handled. Like if Jason is loved enough for his parents to care about meeting his needs in a nurturing way. Through empathy and reassurance, we can help him be cooperative. Often its easy enough to turn the dilemma into a game.  Anything can be turned into a game…it doesnt take much.  As soon as I start cooking dinner, Jason knows Dad is going to be home soon and generally starts to melt down if I try and ignore him while I cook. Today I asked for help cutting basil from the plant and chopping it, cleaning the pan we cooked the chicken in and setting the table.  He LOVED his jobs and actually took them very seriously.

There is a bigger task at hand than getting dinner on the table, in every interaction I have with Jason, Im laying the foundation for him to have a fulfilling life. The win-win situations that I help create is teaching Jason that love is what matters and that is he lovable…and, God, is he lovable.

I know from experience that achievement, success, and happiness are all directly related to love. Teaching Jason to have loving relationships with other people will bring him happiness. Its not his IQ, or the money he will obtain,  its being able to give and receive love, thats the ultimate win-win.

My husband’s parents recently brought him and I two fresh lobster tails, from the Florida Keys.  I had company and rather than freezing them, I was looking for a dish that I could make so we could all enjoy them. Food Network is the first place I go when I’m looking for a recipe.  As soon as I see Paula Deen’s recipe come up on something I’m looking for, I’m sold.  It was a total hit and has been repeated many times…just not with lobster. I’ve used imitation crab meat instead and its still quite tasty.

I have recently discovered a recipe from the Stoneware Inspirations cookbook by Pampered Chef that makes the best individual bread bowls that I have used for chili but would have gone great with this soup.

Bread Bowls

• 2 Packages (13.8 oz) refrigerated pizza crust
• 1tbs olive oil
• 1/2 cup parmesan cheese

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.  Remove pizza crust dough from packages, do not unroll.  Cut each portion of dough crosswise into thirds to form six equal portions.  Place dough cut side down onto greased baking sheet, pres lightly to form 4-inch rounds. Brush lightly with oil and sprinkle with parmesean cheese. Bake 21-23 min or until deep golden brown. To serve slice off top of each round, carefully removecenters to form bowls.  Place bread bowls into serving bowls. (I bought these from Target)

Creole Shrimp and Lobster Bisque

• 2 steamed fresh lobster tails
• 4 tablespoons butter
• 1 small white onion, finely chopped ( I used a leek instead)
• 2 stalks celery  finely chopped
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 1/3 cup all-purpose flour
• 3 cups chicken broth
• 1/2 pound steamed medium size fresh shrimp, peeled, deveined, and chopped
• 2 cups half-and-half
• 1 teaspoon Creole seasoning

Remove lobster meat from shell; coarsely chop and set aside.

In a large saucepan, melt butter over medium heat. Add onion, celery, and garlic; cook for 5 minutes, stirring occasionally. Stir in flour, and cook for 2 minutes. Stir in chicken broth; cook for 10 minutes, stirring occasionally, until thickened.

Add lobster meat and shrimp. Stir in half-and-half and Creole seasoning; cook for 10 minutes, or until heated through, stirring occasionally. Serve immediately.

On a recent trip to Parents Magazine’s # 1 rated zoo in the country, Lowry Park, I dropped our Nikon D60 and the lens resembled the picture above.  Although it was still able to take great photos with no sign of the damage, it was dropped off today for repair.  I couldn’t show you the actual damage but I found this image on istockphoto.com. My first introduction to the world of photography was in a magnet program in middle school.  We learned to roll and develop our film, and process photographs in the darkroom.  I really enjoyed myself and for many years I had an enlarger/dark room on my christmas list. Yes, there was an actual list addressed to Santa until I left for college.  I would always end up removing the enlarger and replacing it with half a dozen other things.  In high school I always had a camera around my neck and if it was missing from my neck it was always near by.  I took a brief hiatus in college but always seem to have it in arms reach now that Jason is around.

After being reconnected with two old friends on facebook, and seeing their sucess with photography (Liz Lauren Photography & LH Photography) I too have considered venturing into the field of paid photography.  While photography is one of my passions, my true passion lies with child advocacy.  When I do decide to take a break from my day job and take on another role, its going to be a step in the direction of child advocacy….until then I will have to settle for being Jason’s advocate.  However, if I were going to start a photography business it would be called Cracked Lens Photography.

And finally, the segue to the point that I wanted to write about tonight.  I just finished the “about” section of my blog today and after reading it published am reminded of the Pollyanna world I live in.  It is a conscious decision I make everyday to ignore the evil and the negative influences and surroundings, and gravitate towards the positive ones.  I can’t watch a scary movie unless I go to themoviespoiler.com first and check the ending.  I quite often cry listening to country songs and watching Publix commercials(especially the holiday ones).  I prefer to avoid conflict, probably because I go just a little bit over the top once I am in it…all easily justified by the need to “stick up” for myself and loved ones.

The cracked lens on my camera reminds me of how perfect and how flawed Jason is at the same time.  Today as Jason kicked me because he didn’t get his way, I thought I needed to make a note on my blog that Im not completely lost in my Pollyanna world…and am aware of just how imperfect this family is. When Jason indulges in a little bad behavior or rebells through a little self expression, I want to try and make sure he has a safe outlet to do it. When Jason does find his voice as a young child and a grown man I want him to have the confidence to express it.  Thats my mission.

Thats enough expressing of my voice tonight. Goodnight.